Scared of Your Own Thoughts

Bizarre thing to say isn’t it?

But this is exactly what I was thinking to myself just the other day. I was getting all worked up about a situation and the more I thought about it, the more worked up I became.

This went on for a few hours. My mind was racing with an endless stream of thoughts. Not even one of them was helpful. After those hours passed I found myself saying…

“You’re freaking out over something that hasn’t happened.”

That one sentence stopped me in my tracks. There I was building up this picture in my mind that I chose to believe was real but it wasn’t.

None of it.

I started with a story that was slowly developing into one of horror. What in god’s name made me think I could see into the future and know what was going to happen?

And then actually feel scared about what I thought I knew?? Wow, I’m good. Me, the clairvoyant.

I’m taking bookings now to help you see into your future too.

But the truth is, I can’t see into the future. Not mine and definitely not yours. I don’t even know what’s going to happen in the next 24 hours let alone in a few days or weeks.

Yes, I can certainly make plans for what I want to happen and work towards that, but unexpected events can turn the most meticulously laid out plan upside down in an instant.

It can feel annoying though. It’s true. Sometimes I really want to believe that my fears about the possible outcome of a situation are real. I don’t want to believe that I’m causing my own pain. Why would I do that to myself? But I am, grrr!

At least I know the truth and the truth isn’t always easy to accept, but If I want to stop scaring myself, I’ll have to stop believing in my ‘future-reading’ abilities.

Maybe what I think will happen, happens but it won’t every time and that’s what I need to remember.

We always want to know, don’t we? What’s going to happen, when it will happen, how it will happen.

We don’t know the definitive answer so we make it up and react to our made up story. Ha! Us humans. Aren’t we a funny lot.

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